Christmas Cookie Recipe

This time of year my friends constantly ask me for the recipe for my famous Christmas cookies. So, here we go...

Christmas Cookie Ingredients:
1 cup of water
1 tsp baking soda
1 cup of sugar
1 tsp salt
1 cup of brown sugar
1 tsp lemon juice
4 large eggs
1 cup nuts
2 cups of dried fruit
1 bottle Jose Cuervo Tequila

• Sample the Cuervo to check quality.
• Take a large bowl. Check the Cuervo again, to be sure it is of the highest quality, pour one qtr cup and drink.
• Turn on the electric mixer. Beat one cup of butter in a large fluffy bowl. Add one teaspoon of sugar...beat again.
• At this point it's best to make sure the Cuervo is still OK, try another qtr cup, just in case.
• Turn off the mixerer thingy.
• Break 2 leggs and add to the bowl and chuck in the cup of dried fruit, pick the frigging fruit off floor.
• Mix on the turner. If the fried druit gets stuck in the beaterers just pry it loose with a drewscriver.
• Sample the Cuervo to check for tonsisticity.
• Next, sift two cups of salt, or something. Who giveshz a sheet.
• Check the Jose Cuervo.
• Now shift the lemon juice and strain your nuts.
• Add one table. Add a spoon of sugar, or somefink.
• Whatever you can find.
• Greash the oven. Turn the cake tin 360 degrees and try not to fall over. Don't forget to beat off the turner.
• Finally, throw the bowl through the window, finish Cose Juervo and make sure to put the stove in the dishwasher.

Cherry Mistmas