Demotivators

The Nose Knows

Click on this link and you will see a man. Put the cursor of your mouse on his nose and leave it there and see what happens... bizarre. How do they do it?
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Bubba & The Lawyer

Somewhere in the deep South, Bubba called an attorney and asked, "Is it true they're suing the cigarette companies for causing people to get cancer?"

"Yes, Bubba, that is true."

"And people are suing the fast food restaurants for making them fat and clogging their arteries with all them burgers and fries ... is that true, mister lawyer?"

"Sure is Bubba, but why do you ask?"

"Cause I was thinkin'........maybe I can sue Budweiser for all them ugly women I've been wakin' up with!"

Corsair: Ergonomic Keyboard for Pirates

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A man met a beautiful lady and he decided he wanted to marry her right away. She protested, "But we don't know anything about each other." He replied, "That's all right; we'll learn about each other as we go along."

So she consented, and they were married and went on a honeymoon to a very nice resort.

One morning, they were lying by the pool when he got up off his towel, climbed up to the 10 meter board and did a two and a half tuck gainer, entering the water perfectly, almost without a ripple. This was followed by a three rotations in jackknife position before he again straightened out and cut the water like a knife. After a few more demonstrations, he came back and lay down on his towel.

She said, "That was incredible!"

He said, "I used to be an Olympic diving champion. You see, I told you we'd learn more about ourselves as we went along."

So she got up, jumped in the pool and started doing laps. She was moving so fast that the froth from her pushing off at one end of the pool would hardly be gone before she was already touching the other end of the pool. She did laps in freestyle, breast stroke, even butterfly! After about thirty laps, completed in mere minutes, she climbed back out and lay down on her towel, barely breathing hard.

He said, "That was incredible! Were you an Olympic endurance swimmer?"

'No," she said, "I was a hooker in West Virginia and I worked both sides of the Ohio River."

Hole in One

You Think You had a Bad Day

Who am I now?

Tom Hanks
Except for the hair, he hasn't changed a bit!
Tom Cruise
Ringo Starr
Robert DeNiro
Nicole Kidman
Mick Jagger
Michael Jackson
Michael Jordan
I love the difference between the two MJ's
Paul McCartney
Madonna
Mariah Carey
Marilyn Manson
What happened?
Leonardo DiCaprio
Meg Ryan
Jean Claude Van Damme
Jimi Hendrix
J.Lo
Keanu Reeves
Julia Roberts
Halle Berry
Helen Hunt
Janet Jackson
Eminem
George Clooney
Demi Moore
Drew Barrymoore
Christina Aguilera
Courtney Love
Elton John
Bruce Willis
Angelina Jolie
Britney Spears
Bjork
Cher

IQ Test

You are driving in a car at a constant speed. On your right side is a valley and on your left side is a fire engine traveling at the same speed as you.

In front of you is a galloping pig which is the same size as your car you cannot overtake it. Behind you is a helicopter flying at ground level. Both the giant pig and the helicopter are also traveling at the same speed as you. What must you do to safely get out of this highly dangerous situation?

Answer:







Get your drunk ass off the merry-go-round.